For when you’ve reached your daily bullshit quota before 9am. This 100% cotton tea towel is here for the moments when everything’s gone to hell — the pasta’s boiling over, the dog’s eaten the remote, and someone dared to ask, “What’s for dinner?” again. Dry your dishes? Sure. Wipe your hands? Fine. But mostly, this towel exists to scream into the void so you don’t have to. It’s soft, it’s absorbent, and it’s got more attitude than your last three group chats combined. Perfect for kitchens, breakdowns, and passive-aggressive hosting. Machine washable. Mental stability not included. 50x70cm with hanging loop